Ben asks Olivia why everyone hates her. Olivia: “come at me, bro”. What a keeper.
BAHAMAS! Finally some paradise. JK – it looks like they saved some money picking the week with the worst possible weather. It’s all hurricanes and wind for this romantic beach trip. I bet the hotel was half priced because the windows were probably boarded up half the time.
1 on 1 with Caila… again. Leah needs to start soaking in some rays on this free vacation because he doesn’t seem to want her around, and she knows it. “Why am I even here?” For the free vacation, albeit awful weather… it’s still better than your mom’s house. We barely see Caila’s date because the producers know it’s more interesting to watch Leah melt down. What we do see is Caila mind-rape Ben “I like really like you like you, but not really enough to ever love you like you, like, you know”. WTF? Ben calls this the best date he has ever had even though he spent half the time trying to make her cry. “You’re like way too happy so I think we should take a minute to talk about dying puppies and sad things”. So if anyone questioned why Ben is single before, I’ll just put that right there….. She basically tells him she’s not that in to him but she probably wants to see if the sun comes out in the Bahamas so she wants to stick around.
The sun peeks out just in time for Ben to take the girls on a group date to swim with pigs. Wait…if you cross your arms across your chest, pigs evidently will flee!? Does this only work for like, animal pigs or can we all start using this trick. Ladies… ammiright? “Do you like pigs” – Ben. “I like to eat pigs” – Leah. Ben is so eloquent and I’m really hoping that’s the point when he announces that they have to capture and roast their dinner. Unfortunately, not the case. But we do get to watch the girls squeal while he gives all of his attention to Lauren B and ignores everyone without Jojo’s boobies. Becca tells him it’s super obvs that he is totes in to Lauren B but it’s all good, she’s just here for the pigs. Leah is fed up with being invisible and decides to throw Lauren B under a non-existent bus so now everyone hates her and she needs to GTFO. She desperately goes to his room after the cocktail party to make her own one on one but she uses her 5 minutes of alone time to bash Lauren B again so he sends her home. “I literally didn’t see that coming”. Really? Because I feel like it’s all you’ve been talking about.
2 on 1 with Emily and Olivia. This was amazing. Not only was it the worst day ever to be on the beach #sandinmylipgloss, Ben becomes Emily’s hair stylist, and barely waits 10 minutes to take Olivia aside with a rose to get her hopes up before she realizes he’s just trying to put her far enough away from the getaway boat so that he and Emily can make a run for it. “Psych, B—ch! Emily, run!” Then she watches them pack up the entire crew and leave for the next 45 minutes.
Lauren H sadly leaves us. Side note – #BeccaforBachelorette… anyone else?