Juan Pablo: The Juan we hate most

As we count down to the premier of beautiful Jojo as the Bachelorette on Monday… I would like to acknowledge someone I despise. I know.. doesn’t seem like it coincides right?

Well, I hear a spoiler that there will be an appearance of my second least favorite ever, Jake  Pavelka. Who is a total dick that picked manipulative trailer trash as his fiancé ex girlfriend.


But more than I could ever hate him, as he is number 2 to me, the thought reminded me of my number one. Well, more accurately public enemy number JUAN.


Can we all agree this guy was the WORST!? He used freaking ESL as an excuse to say he doesn’t understand anything. To this day, my Matthew will say “essss okay” just to f–k with me and it will make my blood boil. How he pissed off Andi and Sharleen (the two smartest broads ever on this show), I will NEVER understand, except I totally understand. Shareleen Joint, Opera singer and world traveler, is my spirit animal. She was wayyyy too smart for this douche nozzle. And for the show in general. Which is why she didn’t come back. And got engaged to some hot successful non-douche non-ape.


Not trying to be a hater. I’m just a fan of honesty and Juan was a jerk to my love, my life, C Harrison. Did anyone watch the after show?


It was like Nikki was a hostage. SO as far as I’m concerned, we should send him to the Bermuda triangle to make illegitimate children until he lands at the end of a flat earth and just falls the eff off. The producers will never let him back on for any reason and thank God for that.

He basically broke Clare.


And poor Nikki had to deal with it. Well, she didn’t HAVE to. But she did. “I like you maybe yes? No marry but maybe yes you have the sex with me for a while”? Pretty much how he proposed/non-proposed…and subsequently wasted the producers time. Ammiright?


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